


the one where tony stark gets placed in... hufflepuff?

by paxatonic



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-08
Updated: 2017-09-27
Packaged: 2018-11-29 13:12:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11441622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/paxatonic/pseuds/paxatonic
Summary: The Sorting Hat is silent for five whole minutes before calling out, almost smugly: Hufflepuff.-the one where Tony gets put in hufflepuff and it's all very upsetting bc he's supposed to be in ravenclaw and lovely stranger Steve comes to the rescue and the author knows very little abt harry potter so don't kill him ty xxx





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I posted a headcannon very late last night with the intention of deleting it but so far no one has yelled at me for it so I guess it's alright, and I wrote this here u go  
> original post: https://transboystark.tumblr.com/post/162734434589/hi-its-12am-and-i-would-like-to-introduce-a  
> and yeah I love hogwarts/harry potter aus why isn't there more of that shit

All the first years were teeming with excitement and nervousness about their house placements as they stood in the crowd, and as good fun or pure distraction most partook in a game played in whispers with the people around them. It’s not that complicated, and has very quick results: guess the house before the hat does. Some are difficult: the quiet ones tend to go to Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff, but it’s not an exact science, and finding them in the other two houses isn’t that uncommon. The rich and the legacies are easy to place because they like to announce where they’ll be, especially if the two overlap. Upperclassmen like this game because they get better at if every year; they memorize the walks and the facial expressions, their clothes, their haircuts; when you know what to look for, it sometimes seems like you don’t need the hat at all.

When Tony Stark gets called, everyone already knows his house: Ravenclaw. Howard Stark was a famous Ravenclaw, and Tony’s made it quite clear the entire train ride there that Ravenclaw is the superior house. Quietly someone defends he could be Slytherin, since he’s clever and resourceful as hell. Pepper Potts, somewhere in the crowd, mutters that he’s reckless enough to be Gryffindor, but she knows he has enough heart, too, with bravery to match. Tony himself thinks he wouldn’t mind those houses, and quickly drafts a few speeches he’d give to his father to defend them. However he knows that Ravenclaw is his only option. As he sits down he steels himself and repeats over and over: Ravenclaw. Ravenclaw. Ravenclaw.

The Sorting Hat is silent for five whole minutes before calling out, almost smugly: Hufflepuff.

 

The hall was silent for a few beats, everyone shocked. A few students from Slytherin start to break off into groups with snide comments and snickering, the head of Ravenclaw stammers, dumbfounded, even the teachers are exchanging surprised glances. Tony tears off the hat and runs. The crowd parts to let him through and everyone seems to just let him go, until one chair from Gryffindor slides out and Steve Rogers goes running after him.

Tony was sitting in the courtyard against a wall when Steve found him, taking in uneven breaths as he presumably tried to pinpoint the moment where he fucked up so badly.

“Hey,” Steve said softly. “You okay?”” Tony looked up at him sharply and Steve ducked his head. “Yeah, sorry, stupid question.” He paused for a moment and took a seat next to Tony.  “I’m Steve.”

Tony looks everywhere that isn’t Steve and stays silent for a few moments before muttering out, “Tony.”

There’s another pause as Steve thinks of what to do next, thinking he’s really not cut out for this, but he feels compelled to try. “You know, Hufflepuff doesn’t sound that bad.”

Tony snorted. “Tell that to my father.”

Steve tilted his head and considered it. “Okay.”

“What?” Tony laughed a little as he looked at Steve, and this time really looked at him- boy, who could be upset looking at those eyes? “Don’t even joke. My impending doom is enough for me to worry about, let alone yours, too.”

“I’m not joking. Whoever your dad is, I’ll look him in the eyes and tell him… Well I don’t know, but I’m sure it’ll be firm and fair and make him change his ways.”

“My father doesn’t change.” Tony rolled his eyes. “Don’t you know who he is?”

Steve blinked. “No. Should I?”

Tony looked at him in bewilderment. “You mean you really don’t know? Howard Stark. Genius inventor and innovator of the wizarding world. Have you been living under a rock?”

“A muggle one.” Steve shrugged.

“Wait, so you’re-? Really?”

He nodded. “Muggle born. Great great grandma somewhere on my mother’s side- it was so long ago we forgot about it, assumed it was just a story. Come my birthday... Tada! Turns out it’s not.” Steve started plucking grass and focused on tearing it into tiny shreds in his hands, one blade at a time.

“Wow.” Tony shifted his whole body to face Steve. “I’ve always wanted to study squibs and muggle borns, the research on it is half-assed at best, I just never really bought the genealogy-” he stopped and sucked in a breath, “sorry.” He sighed and sat back against the wall. “That was probably rude. I’m told I have a problem with that. You’re not a science experiment. But now you’re definitely not talking to my father; he’s kind of pretentious.”

“A pretentious wizard? How strange. I’ve never encountered a single one.” Steve looked at Tony as if to say,  _ come on. Seriously? _

“Yeah, I know.” Tony laughed. “You can probably take care of yourself. You just… I don’t know. I don’t want him to change your view of me.” Tony looked down.

Steve paused, surprised. Then he smiled and snatched Tony’s hand. “Alright, I won’t confront him. But if sends you a howler there is gonna be hell to pay.”

“No, our family is more private and passive aggressive. But thank you.” Tony squeezed his hand.

There was a long pause where the two boys stared at each other before Steve started getting up from the ground and tugged Tony with him. “Come on, before we get in trouble.”

They didn’t stop holding hands until absolutely had to.

  
  
  
  



	2. houses make no sense

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> back by popular demand.... the weird au i came up w when I was half asleep

Tony slammed a stack of books onto the table, startling Steve into an upright position. He'd previously been trying to keep his eyes open while studying what seemed like the most boring chapter on charms he'd ever encounter, and was glad he was being given an excuse to ignore it.

“It's all bullshit.” Tony pulled out a chair opposite from Steve and dropped into it. “The houses make no sense.”

“What-?” Steve tilted his head.

“Steve, just think about it. We're eleven, and already being divided upon huge characters traits that  _ are going to change _ . Like, isn't that the whole thing about adolescence? Ages 11-18, under construction, major changes happening. I'm not the same person that I was a  _ week _ ago.”

“Okay, so, the hat can predict the future.” Steve shrugged. “It can tell what type of person you'll be and puts you in the house that'll help you get there.”

“Even if that's the case, why even have houses?” Tony threw a hand up in exasperation. “What's the point if we take all the same classes anyways? We shouldn't be divided by personality, because then it just leads to more elitist bullshit. Like, what happened to diversity of opinion? No wonder people hate Slytherin; the bad ones that go there spiral deeper into shit because they don’t even have to confront ideologies that differ from their own.” The boy sat back in his chair, taking in a deep breath.

Steve opened his mouth to reply but paused, then he sighed deeply. “You haven't told him yet, haven’t you?”

Tony frowned, looking away. “Maybe I haven't. What's that got to do with anything?”

“It's been two weeks, Tony. Sooner or later news is gonna get out and no teacher is gonna be able to stop it from happening. Wouldn't it be better if your dad heard it from you first?” Steve looked to his friend sympathetically.

“Yeah, well, I'm only twenty pages into a thirty five page essay in defense of Hufflepuff and dismantling the whole houses idea.” The smaller boy tilted his head back and stared at the ceiling. “I need time to finish the draft, make edits, have it peer reviewed-”

“Tony.” Steve interrupted him. “Stop stalling and tell him. He shouldn't need a paper to justify loving you despite something silly like  _ house _ placement.” He snorted.

“You don't know the guy.” Tony mumbled. “Also, why are you always right? It's annoying. I'm supposed to be right all the time.”

Steve smiled softly at him. “It probably has to do with all the time I’m investing in your life instead of studying.”

Tony’s head popped up in surprise and he drew his shoulders in on himself. “Oh, I’m sorry, I have been bothering you a lot, haven’t I?” He looked off to the side. “I should be able to deal with this myself-”

“Oh, just be quiet.” Steve rolled his eyes. “It was a joke. I love helping you out. It’s certainly better than this.” He gestured to the closed textbook in front of him. “Anyways, what are friends for?”

_ Friends. _ Tony smiled and leaned forewards, reading the textbook name upside down. “Charms? You know, if you need help, I’d be happy to study with you.”

“No, you don’t have to-” Steve started, but Tony was already moving his chair around the table to be seated next to Steve. The boy choked up when Tony pressed up against him.

“It’s no problem. My dad had me read all these old books when I was a kid, so I know this stuff inside and out. What chapter were you on?” Tony pulled the book to them.

Steve paused and cleared his throat, opening the book.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tony swears a lot for an eleven year old lmao  
> idk how to write kids I mainly write in my voice for everything cause I'm bad @ this  
> also do first years take charms I haven't seen or read harry potter in like six years


	3. the inevitable quidditch chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tony helps steve train for tryouts

“Come on, is that the best you’ve got?” Tony smirked, flying high above Steve’s head.

“I thought you were gonna help me train,” Steve grumbled, regaining his balance on the broom and floating up to be level with the other boy. “Not just make fun of me the entire time.”

“I am helping. You’re just not good.” Tony giggled- really, he fucking giggled- as he sat back on the broom and twirled the rocks he’d charmed around his fingers. “Here, think fast!” He sent one of the rocks flying over Steve’s shoulder. The boy threw his hand up but still missed by about a foot. “You’re gonna need to be faster than that to make Keeper.” Tony clicked his tongue.

“Yeah, well, we’re using  _ rocks _ ! A Quaffle is huge compared to rocks.” Steve sighed. “Of course I’m not gonna catch these.”

“This whole thing is supposed to teach you reflexes. You learn how to catch these,” Tony paused as the rock returned to his hand and he tossed it in the air and caught it, “then you can catch anything.”

“Yeah, whatever. Let’s see you catch ‘em, why don’t you?”

Tony rolled his eyes and waved the rocks over to Steve, taking his position at the goals. “Ready when you are, big guy.”

Steve narrowed his eyes and slipped his wand out of his robes, sending a few of the fair sized rocks across the field. Tony dodged around in an almost lazy fashion, catching them all and dropping them one by one to the ground. “Come on, really lay it on me.”

“Alright, you asked for it.” Steve sent the remaining rocks out in confusing directions, flying so fast even he couldn’t keep track of all of them. 

Tony caught the first two in one hand with a sweeping motion, then dipped the front end of his broom down and swung the back end to block another. He then ducked to the left and knocked the last one out of the sky. He smiled smugly at Steve as he floated towards him. “Either you’re bad at this, or I’m incredible.”

“Didn’t you count the rocks?” Steve smirked. Then a stone whizzed past Tony’s face, and he turned sharply to chase it. He pushed his broom as fast as it could to catch up, keeping on the stone’s tail as it dodged around. His hand wrapped around the stone just before it passed through the hoop. He held it up and grinned back at Steve.

They both descended to the ground, Steve clasping a hand on Tony’s shoulder and bringing him closer as they laughed.

“You’d think I was training to be a seeker,” Tony said as their laughter died into chuckles. They looked up at each other and were quiet for a moment, and wow, Tony never questioned his sexuality more than when looking into the beautiful blue eyes of Steve Rogers.

“You’re tellin’ me.” Both the boys looked up to see professor Fury emerging from the shadow of one of the stands. “You’d be hard pressed to find anyone on the hufflepuff team that could fly so fast. You make those modifications yourself?”

Tony glanced down at the broom in his hands: standard issue from the school. “Uh, yeah, sorry if that’s not allowed but I can pay for it-”

Fury waved a hand. “I assume you’re going to be trying for Hufflepuff seeker?”

The boy blinked. “But- I’m just a second year.”

“It’s not the craziest thing to happen at this school.”

Shifting his weight around Tony crossed his arms, “I don’t know, professor. I’ve never really been that into sports.”

“Watching and playing is a whole different experience. I can see it, that you  _ like  _ being up there, that you belong on that broom.” He paused and took a step back, “can’t force you. But I expect to see you at tryouts on friday.”

With that the men disappeared again into the shadows- well, if you tried you could see him exit the field around the stands, but it’s more fun to think he disappeared. Tony turned to Steve and raised his eyebrows, “ready for some competition?”

“You’re a little cocky a little fast, aren’t you? How do you know you’ll be on the team?”

“Did you  _ see _ me?” Tony grinned, laughing at himself. “Alright, we should probably get training again. I’ll go get the Quaffle.” He turned to start walking away.

“Ohthankgod.” Steve sighed.


	4. christmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first Christmas after Bucky, Steve decided he wants to stay at school over the holidays. Tony has other ideas.

Steve frowned up at his friend. “You don’t need to do this, Tony. You don’t need to keep an eye on me.”

“Since when is inviting my good friend over for the holidays keeping an eye on him?” The hufflepuff dropped into the chair next to Steve at the dining table. “Listen, you can do what you want, I’m sure the castle is very nice over the holiday season, but I literally live in a house this size back in the states. Two, in fact, if you’d rather we go somewhere colder, my folks just always head south and wait it all out. Winter wonderland isn’t really our thing.”

Steve sighed. “And sure you’re not doing this ‘cause of Bucky?”

“Positive. Scout’s honor.” The boy bit into an apple, talking with his mouth full, “you can meet my ma, too.”

“Swallow, please.” Steve chuckled with an eye roll.

Tony gulped and winked, “whatever you say, big boy.”

Fighting a small blush Steve gave in. “Fine. I’ll go. But there will be no coddling me.”

“As if.” Tony scoffed. “Not from me, at least. My mom might bake you some cookies.”

“She bakes?”

“Well, no, she’ll probably conjure something or just, you know, go to the store,” he pointed at Steve, “but there’ll be hell to pay if you call her out on it. If she says she baked ‘em you best believe the woman.”

 

-

 

“Come on! Keep up!” Tony clapped,  walking backwards at a clipped pace as Dum-E struggled to push his bags behind him. “You are  _ not _ making me late again. I’ll turn you into a coffee maker!”

When he turned around he nearly slammed into Steve, who was waiting with his bags already. “Did I hear coffee? American coffee? God, would I kill for some starbucks.” Steve laughed as he steadied Tony, who had stumbled backwards.

Tony made a mental note to have starbucks delivered to them every morning. “Sorry, empty threat.” He lifted a hand to the side of his mouth and whispered, “I would never really get rid of him.”

Steve nodded with a smile. “This is the first time he’d been out of your dorm. What do people think of you toting around a robot?”

“Oh, I’ve been getting dirty looks all day. I guess science is a muggle thing now?” Tony sighed. “Remember when magic  _ was _ science? They’re not that different to me.”

“Personally I’d have gone for a house elf.” Steve and Tony looked to find Justin Hammer walking up to them in an ugly blue sweater vest and light purple long sleeve underneath, a smug grin plastered on his face. He gestured to Dum-E, “but we all can’t be so fortunate.”

“Oh, how horrible, I live in a slavery-free household.” Tony rolled his eyes. “What the hell do you want, Hammer?”

“Just making friendly conversation.” He held his hands up in mock-innocence. “Wondering what your holiday plans were. Me and my family are going to Aspen for the winter; we own a quaint little mansion out there. It’s honestly the best. I’d invite you to come along, but,” he winced, “sorry. Ravenclaws only.”

“You’re such a little bitch,” Tony mumbled to himself whilst sighing, pinching the bridge of his nose. Then he looked back up at Justin, unamused. “Look, Justin-”

“Me and Tony will be spending christmas together, actually.” Steve stepped in. “You know, since we’re such good friends. I wouldn’t expect you to know what that’s like, though.” He looked at Tony, “can we go?”

A sour look crossed Justin’s face. “Chill out, Prince Charming. The mistletoe won’t  _ wilt _ in the time you’re here, plenty of time to get cosy by the fire-”

“Don’t even  _ start _ ,” Tony snarled, “you pig-headed imbecile.”

“You might think you’re so high and mighty now, Stark, but you won’t be talking when I’m head boy-” Justin started.

“Get over yourself, Hammer. We’re third years. And anyway if this,” Tony gestured at Justin widely, “is what Ravenclaw is like? I want no part in it. Let’s go, Steve.” He grabbed Steve’s arm and yanked it as he went on his way, Dum-E trailing behind.

Justin stammered behind them. “I- you- you’ll be hearing from my father!”

“The sorting hat should’ve sorted you into the trash, Justin.” Tony rolled his eyes, continuing on his way. “Your dad knows it. I won’t be hearing  _ shit _ .”

They got outside and Tony finally let go of Steve, who raised an eyebrow. “You really won’t be getting in trouble for that?”

“Oh,  _ loads _ , Hammer’s dad is just as much of a dick as he is, and my dad has to be nice to him ‘cause they’re both, like, titans of industry of some shit. I will be getting a  _ firm _ talking to. But not until I get home, so,” he dug around in his pocket, pulling out an assortment of small boxes, “ready to have fun on the way there?”

“Chocolate frogs?” Steve laughed, taking one and tearing at the seal. “A little juvenile, don’t you think?”

“They’re not regular frogs.” Tony smiled as the little frog hobbled out of the box and onto Steve’s hand, swaying for a bit until is plopped down on it’s back legs and continued to sway minutely. For a moment Steve was confused until the smell hit him and it clicked, holding the frog up to his face, “No way!”

“Mm-hmm.” Tony bit back his grin, getting closer to observe as well.

“They can-”

“Yep.”

“To- the frogs?”

“Absolutely.”

“But- how even…” Steve peered at his curiously, from a normal distance.

Tony rested a hand on Steve’s shoulder. “If you didn’t think that weed was a wizard’s invention, you’ve never tried it.” He squeezed lightly and went about opening his own package of (pot) chocolate frog.

“Bucky would’ve loved this.” Steve smiled wistfully, remembering his trouble-making friend. In all honestly, Bucky wouldn’t just adore this, he’d be the one  _ making  _ it.

Tony paused, then slipped the half-open package in his hand back into his pocket. “Hey, you know, I can still book a flight to Brooklyn. I’d love an excuse to blow off my family another year. Hell, if you wanna go alone, there’s no reason I have to be there, I can totally afford to get you there-”

“It’s fine, Tony.” Steve smiled at him. “Bucky wouldn’t want all that  _ crying on his grave _ stuff. If anything he’d be angry if I  _ didn’t _ go to Miami. Anyways,” he smiled a little brighter, “I want to spend christmas with you, and meet the makers of such a…  _ fine young wizard _ .”

Tony smiled. “Alright, grandpa. Don’t make me tear up.”

There was a short, comfortable silence- not uncommon for the two of them, but this one was just a little different. This time Tony took a step closer. Then Steve sucked in a breath and took in the details he’d been overlooking on Tony’s face- brown eyes shimmering in the sunlight and snow, rosy cheeks, air exhaling from his parted lips, and just as Steve thought maybe,  _ maybe _ this is their moment-

A frog jumped out of Tony’s pocket.

“Shit!” The boy exclaimed, stepping away. “I’m in so much trouble if anyone finds that thing!” He looked around wildly and then launched himself directly into a pile of snow. Well, that’s one way to cool down sexual tension.

Steve sighed and joined in the search.

**Author's Note:**

> hey y'all come be my friend on tumblr (transboystark)


End file.
